Valentines Day 2023

Valentines Day 2023

Our love isn’t the type of love that you see in the movies. It's not always happy and rainbows. There is a ton of dips and a ton of highs. This love isn’t one that everyone sees the work through it. From the outside you can probably see all the rainbows and sunshine but behind the scenes is where the work is being put in place. We’ve had to fight for this relationship from the start. 


Not many people actually know this but literally from day one we had people saying we shouldn’t be together. The moment it was known that we were even heading towards any feelings we had friends and family saying this wasn’t a good idea. Then a few short weeks later we had yet another attempt of someone trying to change the course of our relationship. This went on for our entire dating and engagement. So many people have told us not to be married. Friends tried to intervene and even tried to get others on board with trying to separate us. Even family tried to pull us apart. 


Yet here we are, a little over 13 years later, and we are still together and strong. We sit up at night at times and reminisce on the times that so many people thought they knew what was best for us and our lives only to sit back and know how wrong they were. I get it, I truly do, who gets married at 18 and 19? Shoot if you asked me, before my husband, if I saw myself getting married so young, I would have said no. I never thought young and married was what I was going to do. But dang am I so thankful to have met him at such a young age. 


We have continued to share a lot of the times that were substantial in our marriage that should have wrecked us. Let me share them real quick though, 2 difficult pregnancies, chronic illness, loss of a child during pregnancy, loss of a parent, loss of friends and moving to a new state. But what we don’t talk so much about was this time when grief took its toll on our marriage. I don’t plan to go too far into details but grief had us clawing at each other all of the time. We had a time where the smallest things would cause us to get into a fight and continue to be mean to each other longer than we truly needed to. To add to this, we didn’t understand fully what the other needed during the time of the fight. We just kept fighting and knocking each other lower. I hate to say it but that wasn’t even that long ago. Shoot that was about 6 years ago. 


6 years of fighting but learning to fight for each other not at each other. I don’t have the answers on how to have a solid marriage. I never will honestly. But I know for our marriage I continue to sit back and just be amazed at the passion that we have for our marriage. We have come so far from the dating days but we haven’t been this strong in our relationship until now. It took those downs to make the everyday life the best life. In those down times or dark times, whatever you want to call them, that’s when we really leaned heavily on our faith and really turned even more to God. We do even in the good days but when you take the bad and turn to God instead of any worldly items, that’s when the real work is being done. That’s when we noticed we truly are fighting for the marriage and not selfish reasons. 


Going on 12 years of marriage and I just want to say my peace to all those that fought to not have this relationship happen, thank you. I think that God used you all to lay the foundation of the relationship that I have now with my husband. We leaned into our relationship and into God for the strength to push through and now we continue to walk together every day. My husband has seen me through some of my darkest days and continues to show up every time. I continue to just tear up thinking that I am not sure anyone else could handle being the husband to someone that can get so sick at a moments notice. It takes a certain person, one that only God could put in my path, to be able to fight when your spouse cant. 


Im not going to lie, I really could have seen my life going in a completely different direction. Ive said that many times to my husband. But man, am I just so thankful to sit back and see the work of God and his direction for my life. He put the best man in my life and for every day I am thankful. I get to love my best friend every day. 


This is not the typical Valentines Day type blog but I think it’s safe to say that Jeremy and I are used to the “non-typical” style life. We live it well and we live it well together. Happy Valentines Day Jeremy. I love you. Forever and Always my squishy. P.S. Are you gonna kiss me or not? 

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