Good morning! I know there is a post on social media happening around this time when this is posted. But I genuinely do not know if it has been posted or is going to be posted in a few days. Either way, we are going to chat now about it. We are going to take a moment to update you on my health. I know we just accomplished a whole series about different techniques of holistic approaches and how I add them into my life. The benefits and the reason I use them but I haven’t given an actual update on my actual health. So let’s do that today.
I will say I am thankful for where I am at currently for my medical side but it isn’t as easy as a lot of people think. I’ve been hearing about how everyone is so excited that I am finally doing better and that kinda made me realize that I haven’t shared so much the medical “darkness” lately. I have been fighting off about 1-2 episodes a week. But these episodes come out of know where. A lot of the time I am blindsided and next thing I know I am clinging to the toilet, praying for it to pass. There have been a few of them that if they didn’t pass, I know I would have ended up in the hospital. But thankfully they have.
On top of the nausea, I have been dealing with about a 3 or more week long episode of fatigue. Im taking naps all of the time to just get through the day. Then by evening, I am ready to go back to bed by 9 pm. To which, I usually stay up until 10 to ensure I will actually sleep through the night. I can drink loads of coffee and it doesn’t touch the fatigue at all. So usually I spend the morning up and moving. Being with the kids, cleaning, working, doing homestead things. Then I will eat and take a nap. Then up to do a little bit more around the house before dinner and then in bed the rest of the night.
This all is a great plan but I continue to push my body when I am feeling fine. To which a great comment was made. “You are just pushing your next episode to come faster.” That one hit me right up side the head. That was a great perspective. When I push through and don’t actually rest, I am just pushing my body to get ready for its next episode to happen quicker than if I took the time to rest. Let me also say, I can have this epiphany now but that doesn’t mean it will work down the road. But for the current set of my body, I need to practice the rest and doing something for myself daily too in hopes to add rest into my body.
I always feel like when I nap it means I am lazy but I am starting to realize that this is helping me heal and then on those good days, I can be the mom I want to be. Or when I rest, I can actually get those projects done like I wanted to. Ya know?
Now I will say this all fell in a highly inconvenient time. With Skylar and my Birthday, fathers day, Skylars birthday party, Family down for a visit and so much more. So I have had to spend a lot more time up and moving when I should have rested. We are a very active bunch but I definitely took some time to rest during all of those times.
The other thing we are dealing with is my shaking side effect with cyclical vomiting is getting worse. There are times when it is crazy apparent that I am shaking. Other times I can hide it a bit. Like as I am typing this, I am having a little tremor. I haven’t been able to fully figure out what triggers this side effect but definitely it happens after fighting so hard to not vomit. But also when I am in recovery the following few days. But lately it has been happening randomly. I am thinking it may be part of the fatigue phase and it piggy backs off of any of the time that my body is a little tired. To which it is not actually a horrible side effect. Well unless I am trying to clean straws, then thats a mess and I struggle massively. But we laugh and get through it. It is also best if I just let myself tremor instead of trying to contain it. If I try to contain it, I seem to make it worse at a later point. There’s a few different ideas I have been thinking of trying to see if it’ll help at all but I am not sweating it really.
So in reality we just haven’t been sharing so much of the bad parts recently. Not that we don’t want to but when it comes to the bad times, we are so focused on getting through them and then getting back to normal. I actually had a time recently where I had so much pain, that my meds that should last 8 hours only lasted 3 hours instead. When I am in the episode, I don’t share it with everyone because I’m not wanting to essentially live it twice. Like I am already trying to fight and live through this episode. I don’t necessarily have the energy to also share it with everyone else. Im thinking I may need to try to so some people can pray if they want to. But that I will have to call upon Jeremy to help with. I personally can not do so while in the middle of fighting. There’s only so much fight! Haha.
Maybe we need to share more. Jeremy does remind me that I am very positive on this chronic illness journey and I can’t disagreed but I guess I should try to get out of my bubble a little more! So let’s try that on social media. I think that would be the best option personally. So recap, health not so good. Side effects are ridiculous. I am still the positive mindset person. There is a crap ton of fight left in me. This illness can kill me but so far I’m winning that odds. I’m going to go kick butt now and I will talk to you all next time!